Spring Cleaning
I just had a tooth removed yesterday.
It was to be an eventual thing anyway, this tooth that has been bothering me since January this year. However, I procrastinated and postponed and reasoned myself out to delay my decision to visit the dentist to have the whole mess extracted out of my life. My ultimate fear was to have huge gaping hole staring at me from the bottom of my gum. And the pain of it.
Upon extraction, pumped up with anaesthetic to the brim, I would expect to feel nothing for the first few hours.
But as reality dawns and anaesthetic wears out, I could already imagine the pain I would have to go through.
And the gaping void that was once filled. Even with a mess that had to be removed. My tongue would wander to the once-filled space and would miss having it there. The contour, the feel and the touch of it. I told myself it would take time to get used to this new-found space.
But well, might as well. My dentist was proud of me and so was I with myself.
Sometimes my mind would wander off and I would miss my tooth. I miss it dearly for the life of me and I cried for having it eventually removed. I have cried buckets of tears anyway for the pain it caused me but now, like a survivor accepting its fate, I cried tears of learning to come to terms with the loss and one day, one day I know I will forget of ever having that tooth in my life before.
It was to be an eventual thing anyway, this tooth that has been bothering me since January this year. However, I procrastinated and postponed and reasoned myself out to delay my decision to visit the dentist to have the whole mess extracted out of my life. My ultimate fear was to have huge gaping hole staring at me from the bottom of my gum. And the pain of it.
Upon extraction, pumped up with anaesthetic to the brim, I would expect to feel nothing for the first few hours.
But as reality dawns and anaesthetic wears out, I could already imagine the pain I would have to go through.
And the gaping void that was once filled. Even with a mess that had to be removed. My tongue would wander to the once-filled space and would miss having it there. The contour, the feel and the touch of it. I told myself it would take time to get used to this new-found space.
But well, might as well. My dentist was proud of me and so was I with myself.
Sometimes my mind would wander off and I would miss my tooth. I miss it dearly for the life of me and I cried for having it eventually removed. I have cried buckets of tears anyway for the pain it caused me but now, like a survivor accepting its fate, I cried tears of learning to come to terms with the loss and one day, one day I know I will forget of ever having that tooth in my life before.
Labels: extraction, tooth
posted by Strawberrysurf at 7:48 am
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